DK and kdu

Thank god that we are not not a s/he. We have an identity and are not afraid to show it. We have a real life, love lots of people and stuff. Not only that, we have books that we have written and that have been published. We can tell each other about them, discuss them, talk about our dreams and our lives. We are real people. That is important. We have Dick as a good friend. That is important, too. We have so much that we share. A s/he is a nobody.

Love,
Betty

cc

Here we go again!

kdu,

I don't care who you are, what you wrote, how much money you make, you are rude to come and talk awful to people here.

Why don't you speak civilly?

You obviously want to upset us.

By the way we are not in need of any publishing lectures.

We have had many of them and find them tedious, repetitous and boring.

How much are you paid to lecture like this?

It makes me wonder if you go to a Crusaders school.

Why not do something worthwhile?

You are wasting your energy.

Congratulations, DK, on speaking well at AW.

We have to remember that anyone can post here and on most any other board. Many of us here have some past connection, some sharing of emails, even publishing experiences together. We have read each other's books, cried over each other's sadness, laughed when we can and shared joy. Mostly our disagreements have found resolution and we support each other when we can from a verbal, intellectual and sometimes emotional perspective.

The world is full of people with confused minds who may be bent on causing conflict. They can't help it. It is their nature. They have no grasp on the rules of civility in an online community. It's outside their scope of understanding. They see a forum and jump in because they are lonely, or miserable, or have mental demons they are trying to quiet. They do not know how to communicate in a positive and productive way. That is why they must be anonymous; they are afraid in their egocentric world, and they don't know how to join us. Pity them. The artistic world attracts people with unusual ways of thinking for sure.

To argue with a person not equipped for society is as difficult as with a person addicted to any other substance or drug. Their mind is not receptive; too many words are a waste of time and energy.

Of course, it's worth a try. Then, tough love is the best solution in my mind. My church calls it "Gold Key." Wish them well and move on to a more positive venue.

As you can imagine, I'm the Polyanna of finding joy; but sometimes, some people are a concern and better left to find other choices for their energy as well.

kdu wrote:

And really I do not care what Dick thinks of me. It's neither here or there. I don't live for gratification of others.

I suspect, then, you're here to educate? Please. You're arrogance is stiffling.

cc

Why is it so hard for people to simply ignore a post that they don't like/agree with? People can only argue when someone is willing to argue with them. No one needs to resort to rudeness. Simply don't respond.

Merri,
I'm with you. I try to just ignore some posts until I become exasperated, and then respond just to get some relief.

Sometimes I have to sit on my hands to stop from responding.

merrihiatt wrote:

Sometimes I have to sit on my hands to stop from responding.

Merri, sometimes I find myself doing the same. It is definitely easier on the blood pressure!

DK,

I read this response to one of your posts on AW:

"Interesting analysis, DK. Your personal experience is probably
extremely rare for PA, but it worked for you."

I disagree (something I'm good at apparently!). I think your personal experience is probably extremely common for PA and it works for ten of thousands of authors (who do not complain, do not post on AW and have probably learned a great deal from their experience and moved on -- leaving publishing altogether or finding new avenues to publish their books).

Only a handful of disgruntled PA authors hang around at AW with nothing better to do with their time. They are allowed onto, and stay on, the PA threads. Your welcome from the AW mafia was similar to mine but I overstayed my welcome and refused to be worn down and browbeaten by their rhetoric -- so, like many before me and since, I was banned.

The AW members, who post on the PA threads, rationalise their posts under the guise of "saving" serious writers from PA. What a load of nonsense! They are sorting the chaff from the wheat for PA by stripping out the undesirables: the complainers, the discontents, the troublemakers. To boot, it costs PA nothing for this service. It is just as FREE as the publishing service PA offers.

You had a genuine complaint that was addressed and all authors have the same opportunity if they feel they have been mistreated. This is true for all publishers.

The Russians came up with the perfect way to deal with someone who purportedly makes large sums of money from writing by keeping both his/her name and the title of his/her book(s) a secret.
During the fighting at Sevastapol in World War II the Germans mounted loudspeakers and broadcast repeated messages telling the Russians they were backed into a corner and had no option other than surrender. The Russians mounted speakers of their own, made a recording of a large number of men laughing and played it whenever the Germans played theirs.
The next time anyone posts such patently phony comments on this board, start playing the laughing record - ha ha ha.

Ann

I have mixed feelings about posting or not posting. I like this board being a place to express opinions and posters respectfully do so most of the time, which is great. I guess if I ever say something that upsets someone I'd like them to say something, because perhaps there just needed to be some clarification, or I was out of line or had no idea what I was talking about.

Sometimes I don't respond because I have nothing to say. Other times I don't want to get involved in nasty discussions. Others just get too repetitious and everything has been said.

What bothers me is when I am afraid to respond. Those are the feelings that bother me the most. I don't like to be afraid of anything, especially here.

However, there is a great deal of trust on this board, trust that has come from our getting to know each other. When someone comes on "anonymously" telling us we could make lots of money or picked the wrong publisher, red flags go up and we react.

Carol

Shelagh wrote:

The AW members, who post on the PA threads, rationalise their posts under the guise of "saving" serious writers from PA. What a load of nonsense! They are sorting the chaff from the wheat for PA by stripping out the undesirables: the complainers, the discontents, the troublemakers.

Did you notice that one of the respondents said she signed her contract in 2001?

2001.

And she's still at AW, crying about it. What else has she published in the past 8 years? (apparently nothing)

Did you also see this response?

<< Feeling special? I'm sorry, and maybe this is harsh, but since when is it anyone's job to make people feel special? I'm trying to say this and not have it sound mean-spirited, and it IS a big accomplishment to finish a book, no matter the quality. But is this the little league, where we give everyone a trophy for effort, so no one gets their feelings hurt? Nope, it's adulthood, the real world, where not everyone can write a saleable book. >>

Yet the reason they give for repeating themselves like deranged parrots for years on end is because the injured psyches on that board had their writing dreams crushed and were made to feel "stupid" when they went to conferences and learned that PA wasn't regarded as a writing credit.

LOL! In full disclosure, I'm going to write my own article about that board one day.

No need to react, Carol. This is a conversation from Chaper Nine, Mr. Planemaker's Flying Machine (also from episode 24 in the [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] serialisation):

Emmelisa was waiting for the door to close before she spoke to the friendly baldheaded man with the pointed ears, who was waiting patiently.

“I do need some help,” she blurted out finally.

“What is the problem?”

“My life doesn’t seem to be my own,” she replied.

“In what way?”

“There’s a girl at school, Mayja Troublemaker. She’s the school bully. Everybody’s frightened of her. Except me. She can’t push me around the way she pushes everyone else around. So she tells lies to try to make me feel small. Now her whole family follows me around everywhere I go.

“I’ve no freedom. They try to bump into me. They mimic me so that I’m becoming a zombie without any movements they can copy. I’m no longer me. Worse than that, they listen in to everything that’s said here—in this house. EVERYTHING.

“If my mother is discussing something personal, I know that they are listening. They repeat things in the school playground that we’ve said at home—in front of everybody. THE TROUBLEMAKERS. THEY TELL EVERYBODY EVERYTHING.”

“Ah, the Troublemakers. There are troublemakers all over the world. They interfere because they lead such dull lives. Everybody else seems to enjoy a much more interesting life than they do. I know it is difficult to understand. You are very young and this is all very new and unpleasant for you.”

“But why do they tell lies? Why do people believe their lies?”

“The good people in the world do not believe everything they hear. They keep an open mind. Time has a way of bringing the truth out into the open. Often this takes a long time—sometimes it takes years before all the truth is known. Eventually, the liars tell too many lies. They tie themselves up in knots as the truth unravels itself.”

“Are the people who believe lies bad people?”

“No,” Mr. Spaceman said reassuringly,“they are easily led. They are not ‘bad people.’ One way they might feel superior is to believe that someone else is worse than they are. It means they can look down on someone who is more able than they are. It is easier for these people to build themselves up by putting someone else down.”

“Will they ever lose interest in me?” Emmelisa asked.

“Oh no! They are not interested in you at all. They are interested in themselves. You are being used to draw attention to them. They are attention-seekers of the very worst kind. They have very little talent or ability so they have to force the world to notice them. People see through them but are amused and want to use the opportunity to join in the ‘fun’ to liven up their dreary lives.”

“They are not interested in me?” Emmelisa said, wide-eyed in amazement. “It’s me who isn’t interested in them!”

“That is perfectly true. They are competing with you but you have already won! If you were as dull and stupid as they are, they would not waste their free time on you. They would simply pick on you and taunt you if they crossed your path—especially in front of others in order to boost their own egos.

“This is typical childhood bullying. It goes on throughout life and does not end in the school playground. Often the victim is timid and unable to stand up to the bullies. Unfortunately, people who could help prefer not to become involved.

“But you are not afraid. You are a survivor and a winner but you are finding life difficult. I am here to help you through this difficult phase.”

“How am I a winner? And how long will this last?”

“You are a winner because, although they are only interested in themselves, they envy you. They follow you. This proves that you must be much more attractive than they are. After all, no one is following them around.”

“Do I have to wait years for them to stop following me?” Emmelisa was close to tears at the very thought.

“What would you prefer to do?”

“Do I have a choice?” she asked unbelievingly.

“Everybody has a choice. You are the master of your own destiny. You can decide. You can be miserable while you wait for people to learn the truth. Or, you can make the Troublemakers miserable by being happy. Ignore the lies. Learn how to tolerate the interference and start fulfilling your ambitions. You do have ambitions, don’t you?”

“Ambitions,” Emmelisa repeated the word, “ambitions. Yes…I suppose so.”

“You do not sound very sure. Do you have anything planned for the future?”

“No,” Emmelisa replied.

“You thought this computer might help you?”

“Yes. I thought maybe I could find something that would make me feel better.”

“Like a bottle of medicine?” Mr. Spaceman suggested. “There are no magic potions for feeling happy or knowing what you want out of life. You have to work at being happy.”

“It’s too hard,” Emmelisa said despondently.

“Now, Emmelisa,” Mr. Spaceman said sternly, “you are giving up before you have even tried.”

“No. It’s just that you asked me if I had planned anything. I don’t know how to plan things.”

“Well, perhaps that is the question you should ask.”

“What?” Emmelisa thought aloud before the question came rushing into her mind.

“I know the question. The question is—How do I plan my future?”

“Well done!” Mr. Spaceman beamed with a smile wide enough to fill the screen.

“Well,” Emmelisa said with slight irritation at this smug response, “what’s the answer?”

“The answer is inside this computer. You must find the file ‘My Future Life’ that your father stored in the memory of this computer before he died.”

The screen started to flicker as Mr. A. Leon Spaceman said, “Bye for now, Emmelisa. Remember, you are the master of your own destiny.”

Suddenly, the screen was as blank and lifeless as when she’d entered the room.

Eight years is a long time. I have written fifty books in that time.

merrihiatt wrote:

Why is it so hard for people to simply ignore a post that they don't like/agree with? People can only argue when someone is willing to argue with them. No one needs to resort to rudeness. Simply don't respond.

It is no fun to ignore them. We like to toy with them. Exploring their vacant minds is entertaining to us.

cturkel wrote:

Eight years is a long time. I have written fifty books in that time.

Who published them?

LC wrote:

Did you also see this response?

<< Feeling special? I'm sorry, and maybe this is harsh, but since when is it anyone's job to make people feel special? I'm trying to say this and not have it sound mean-spirited, and it IS a big accomplishment to finish a book, no matter the quality. But is this the little league, where we give everyone a trophy for effort, so no one gets their feelings hurt? Nope, it's adulthood, the real world, where not everyone can write a saleable book. >>

Yet the reason they give for repeating themselves like deranged parrots for years on end is because the injured psyches on that board had their writing dreams crushed and were made to feel "stupid" when they went to conferences and learned that PA wasn't regarded as a writing credit.

It rips me apart just thinking about those poor wee souls with dashed dreams.

I thought my book was going to be on the NYT bestseller's list. I need more than tea and biscuits, Kool-Aid and popcorn; I need to feel loved and appreciated. Don't you people realise that my confidence is rock bottom and I might never write another word?

Look at my avatar -- that's the face of a broken writer.

cturkel wrote:

Eight years is a long time. I have written fifty books in that time.

Maybe you'd have been better off had you concentrated on writing one book in that length of time that was actually a good one, instead of fifty second or third rate manuscripts that aren't any good and that no one is ever going to publish.

E. Don Harpe wrote:

cturkel wrote:

Eight years is a long time. I have written fifty books in that time.

Maybe you'd have been better off had you concentrated on writing one book in that length of time that was actually a good one, instead of fifty second or third rate manuscripts that aren't any good and that no one is ever going to publish.

I will second that idea!

Shelagh wrote:

LC wrote:

Did you also see this response?

<< Feeling special? I'm sorry, and maybe this is harsh, but since when is it anyone's job to make people feel special? I'm trying to say this and not have it sound mean-spirited, and it IS a big accomplishment to finish a book, no matter the quality. But is this the little league, where we give everyone a trophy for effort, so no one gets their feelings hurt? Nope, it's adulthood, the real world, where not everyone can write a saleable book. >>

Yet the reason they give for repeating themselves like deranged parrots for years on end is because the injured psyches on that board had their writing dreams crushed and were made to feel "stupid" when they went to conferences and learned that PA wasn't regarded as a writing credit.

It rips me apart just thinking about those poor wee souls with dashed dreams.

I thought my book was going to be on the NYT bestseller's list. I need more than tea and biscuits, Kool-Aid and popcorn; I need to feel loved and appreciated. Don't you people realise that my confidence is rock bottom and I might never write another word?

Look at my avatar -- that's the face of a broken writer.

That's the face of a broken writer?
You did smile when you said that.