Two new audio clips from YouTube

Here is a rough effort at creating two audio clips of about two and ten minutes respectively from selections from my Of Pain and Ecstasy poetry collection. I had time for only one read through and these are rough. But it was a fun mini project.

Of Pain and Ecstasy Clip one: Central Park
Of Pain and Ecstasy Clip 2:Unsung heroes excerpt and selected sonnets

Well done!

Two comments from me (well three actually!) You have a family connection to "Alice" (wife?) and Alice has a family connection to "Victor" (brother). Life is full of coincidences!

About the readings: towards the end of the reading of the first poem, the number of ly adverbs had become too noticeable.

The second poem suffered from over use of "you" -- the poem would have more impact if it were left unsaid until the end that the poem is about your grandfather:

His crime was literacy,
And the possession of a social conscience,
That made him yearn to see his beloved Spain remain free,
And prevented him from suffering fascists lightly.
He did not bear arms,
For he abhorred all violence.
He did not incite rebellion, though he
Rebelled against the foreign and domestic enemies of freedom.

... Now rest in peace, Emilio, my beloved grandfather.

4/1/2013
Victor..
Great videos......
Cheers..Joe...

Thanks for the feedback Alice, Shelagh and Joe!

Shelagh,

In Central Park I was probably attempting to emphasize key words through alliteration and internal rhyming for the sake of contrast but on re reading the poem I agree with you that it does not read well. I may revisit this old friend from 1978 again if I even have the chance to get back to writing poetry more regularly.

As to Unsung Heroes, I purposely chose not to use an objective narrator for this long poem that covers both sets of grandparents (the excerpt deals with my maternal grandfather, Emilio only). It is a personal rather than an objective portrayal filtered through not only my perspective but that of my mom and grandmother who had very different feelings about a man who was universally respected and admired in his community during his lifetime and long after his death. There is an interconnection between the four individual poems that make up this tribute to my grandparents that I could convey, I thought at least, more intimately through a personal narration as if I were speaking to each in turn incorporating more than one point of view and subjective subtext such as the nearly devastating impact that unwavering observance of principle had on my grandmother and her nine children left to fend for themselves.

I agree with you that the poem would read better in the objective voice. It would also read better and have greater impact if it were much shorter. But it would be a different poem in both cases. That does not mean that it would not be improved by paying closer attention to unnecessary repetition which may not work as I intended.

My mom, by the way, whose memory is failing as her cognitive skills slip away a little at a time, tells me almost every day in a cracking voice how much she wishes her father had known me--how very proud he would have been of me and what wonderful discussions he and I would have had from our very different perspectives. It is something she feels so strongly about that it has become almost an endless loop in her mind--something she returns to again and again with much emotion. (Her heart aches because this very gentle man who was an intellectual among troglodytes did not know any of his grandchildren and grand grandchildren who would go on to have careers as physicians, psychologists, economists, very successful entrepreneurs, lawyers (not just me), university professors (not just me), writers and at least one journalist.)

My response to my mom is always the same: all of us piled atop one another do not reach the top of his shoes--or my grandmother's.

I will eventually write about my mom and dad. But not yet. They also have incredible stories of personal courage and an unwillingness to give up in the face of enormous adversity beginning very early in their lives. It gives me great pride to know that no matter what I accomplish in life, my value will never rise above the top of their shoes either despite their strong, mistaken feelings to the contrary.