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Several of us sem to have been composing at the same time.  Much of what Joe and DK are saying here, I was saying in a new thread, Different Strokes.

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I chose to support an ill family member and have lost all my reserves as a result.  Fortunately, the little I earn by writing for the newspaper keeps me afloat.  I paid into Social Security for 51 years.  I paid into the state pension system for 15 years.  Unfortunately, my earnings were small because I chose a career in the "social service" mode where we were trained that we were paid through "satisfaction" in helping others, not real dollars that would make a difference the rest of our lives.

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People who want to take away bits of Social Security don't realize that many receive very little since the payment formula is based on lifetime earnings, not contributions.

SS was never, ever meant to be a total retirement plan. That many people treat it as such doesn't mean everyone else is obliged to supplement them. You've said that you were wealthy at one time. Did you invest any of that wealth in the stock market? Did you buy tech stocks in the 90's? Did you have any kind of side hustle? If not, why not? I recall you said you lost a bunch in a TIAA/CREF fund, but you never named the fund (I'm in TIAA/CREF myself; some funds are better than others, but none has been horrible. Well, their real estate one was pretty bad for a ten year span). 

When you were a social worker, surely you had something to throw at the market?


Ann seems less sympathetic to younger people than older people, but I'm the opposite. I feel older people have had their whole lives to build wealth and shouldn't be robbing 20-and 30-somethings (which is what the misnamed ACA is about) to support them. Instead, older people should be supporting and helping the younger people. Assuming they were always healthy and employed.

But now I AM way off target, lol. Didn't know where else to post this, tho.

So, we're still going off topic.  OK.  yes, I was part of a wealthy society when I was younger, but it wasnt about me, it was about the men who were in charge of my life.  I had no say.  I was naive in many ways at the time of my divorce.  I still carried the values and attitudes I was taught as a child.  I was basically thrown out into a world I did not understand and brought three children with me.  This is not a victim's whine, just a statement of fact regarding my reality at the time.  Truth is, I had no idea how to go about it, and even if I did, the means were not there.  My dad left his estate to my mom, which is what he should have done under the circumstances since she had no freaking idea what to do or how to go about it.  My husband hired sone shrewd attorneys to see to it that he kept the bulk of our community property.  I was pretty naive at the time myself.  But the point was and is that it doesn't matter that much to me, because what I have, I've earned, and I'm not complaining about it. In fact,  I am glad that I've had the experiences that I have had.  I've learned a lot about life from them, and I'm still here and living a life that I feel proud of having lived.

I grew up in a culture where women were not supposed to know about these things.  They were supposed to sit back, do their women's work, and let their fathers and husbands take care of the finances.  That's just the way it was.  So, I was ignorant of how to go about it, and, as I said, I was left without the means.  A first few years teacher's salary, especially when it involved feeding and caring for three young children did not leave much left over.  That's one of those things single mom's face in this world - those single mom's you are so fond of disparaging as being the main reason so many young people are one of the biggest problems of society today.

Look, your life eperiences have led to your worldview, mine have to mine.  I personally don't see why we both cannot broaden each other's perspectives.  I'm really not into fighting to prove who is right or wrong.

Just me.

I actually was addressing DK, sorry I wasn't clearer. She has posted the most complaints about Republicans and the Koch brothers, lol.

I don't see a big difference between Repubs and Dems, myself. They're both warmongers and amnesty advocates. Don't have a lot of good to say about either.

I am very sorry. I should have read your post more carefully. DK and I frequetly see things in a similar way, and had posted about some of those similarities. Didn't mean to hone in her territory.

I happen to agree with DK.  I can see similarities between her experiences and mine. 
Some people risk in the Stock Market.  Some people risk with their talents.  In both cases, it is a gamble.  Who is to say in advance which will pay off and what payment is expected?
There are many of us who achieved monetary success only to lose it.  The ingredients that created the success remain unless that it is thrown away, however there comes a time when the energy required to achieve is no longer there.  It is not just the lack of inspiration, but physical limitations that can negate a comeback.  In that event, we scramble to see what resources are available to survive.  SS is a resource and it is not a handout, but money we paid in.  Welfare is a handout for those who need a hand up.  Those who decide to live on welfare without trying to be self-sufficient are lost souls, however freeloaders are not just found among the poor.  I have known many preachers who fit that category.  Fraud to some is a way of life.  We see that among the rich as well as the poor. 
Young immature people think they will live forever and don’t see the future as a risk.  If they have a good job, they think it will last.  Possessions are their priority to satisfy their ego.  When they experience loss, they begin to be more cautious.  That caution can be a big negative for some and a life-saver for others.  Having been down that road of struggle, having finally made it, losing it all and having to start over again, the excitement and enthusiasm required to make it again was gone.  Some of us finally settle for a life and a lifestyle that provides a way to live with dignity.

Yes, Abe, you summed it up quite well. Thank you. There is no crystal ball.  Those whose luck hold holds out think they are special.  Reality is, no one is better than anyone else.  It's all random as to where we're born and the opportunities and hardships that we face, overcome or die with.

The more life we experience, however, the more we realize that it isn't the "stuff" that matters or the titles or the fame and fortune, it's the joy of friends, family and loved ones with whom we share those journeys, good and bad.

Some days the stuff matters, the memories matter, the hopes and dreams gained and lost matter; but they become fewer as we are grateful to face a brand new day with health, fresh air, sufficient income to have shelter, food and clothing and a little left over for a treat now and then.

Sure, I'd like more opportunities to travel - but I've already been everywhere except the poles, bits of South America and an African Safari. So, if I never left my neighborhood I can read about exotic places and enjoy the read instead of the travel.

I'd like to buy things without worrying about every single nickle.  However, sometimes it's a game I enjoy.  You should hear my mother and I comparing notes on who got the best buy on graham crackers. 

I needed a new 32 inch television for her to visit this winter and lo and behold, Walmart had one for $98.  The timing was perfect and so is the tv.  Sometimes life provides in spite of ourselves.  In fact, those whose spiritual side is well-developed swear that it always does if we just get out of the way.

Agree with both Abe and DK in many ways, but I don't wee it as settling or scrambling.  Looking back, I see it as the best thing that ever happened to me.  Ironically I guess, at the time it was happening, I saw it as the worst, but by the time I had been in Huoston a year, it had becomme more of an adventure, and I didn't miss the things.  Life was no longer about things, as I was focused on the jobs I was doing, with my children at home and my students at school.  Those "things" were simply no longer important.  I was happier than I had ever been in my life.  I had a purpose, and it went beyond my personal existence.  I was a part of something exciting and important.  Toward the end of the years I spent on that first campus, a new principal had a different view of what he wanted for the school, but shortly after, a new campus opened in the same district, and I was able to transfer there, and the excitement started all over again.  It just wasn't about making money any more, and it is still not.

Often, it's a bit like DK's TV. And that is what sybchronicity is all about. And it seems to happen more often when you let go of worrying about it.

alj wrote:

And it seems to happen more often when you let go of worrying about it.

It does.