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 IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?

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joefrank
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joefrank

Number of posts : 8210
Registration date : 2008-11-04
Age : 70
Location : Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyMon May 23, 2011 6:09 pm

5/23/2011


Is common courtesy a lost art today ? Your Opinion ?
I find if I'm going into a store the person ahead of me
doesn't even hold the door. I always hold the door open,
sometimes I get a thank you, other times " Nothing !" I
think people have lost touch ...

Cheers..Joe
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alice
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alice

Number of posts : 15671
Registration date : 2008-10-22
Age : 71
Location : Redmond, WA

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyMon May 23, 2011 6:41 pm

Joe,

The worst I had was a woman yell at me. "I saw you bump my car with your door."
I said, " You did, I have insurance and will gladly pay to have your car fixed.
I was not aware that I touched your car."

Dave looked at her car and our door and said Your damage does not line up."
He showed her that our door could not have hurt her car.
She shrugged and said, " I will let it go."

She either had no manners or lost them.
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joefrank
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joefrank

Number of posts : 8210
Registration date : 2008-11-04
Age : 70
Location : Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyMon May 23, 2011 7:53 pm

5/24/2011


What I call low class trash !


Cheers..Joe
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Domenic Pappalardo
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Domenic Pappalardo

Number of posts : 2557
Registration date : 2009-04-27

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyMon May 23, 2011 8:42 pm

It's the times Joe. I don't think people are going to get better.
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dkchristi
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dkchristi

Number of posts : 8594
Registration date : 2008-12-29
Location : Florida

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyMon May 23, 2011 8:54 pm

I, too, think it will get worse. So many people are anonymous, transient and believe their purpose is all that matters. I think the anonymity of technology has contributed. Everyone is in a hurry with no time for the gracious life that includes respect.
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Abe F. March
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Abe F. March

Number of posts : 10684
Registration date : 2008-01-26
Age : 80
Location : Germany

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyMon May 23, 2011 10:05 pm

Common courtesy is no longer common. There are people who treat others like the golden rule. I fondly remember another kindness that I'll share here.
Reminiscing can be fun. We often remember people and their special qualities.

My wife and I were talking about Canada this evening about the experiences we had while living there. The name of Bob Cummings came up. Gisela remembered our meeting with Bob and his wife Gigi at the Inn on the Park Hotel. They were a warm couple. Bob was especially sensitive to the feelings of others and did his best to give them unexpected recognition.
The first TV show he did in Toronto, he asked the interviewer if he liked his tie. The answer was yes, and Bob said, “I got that from my friend, Abe March.” I didn’t give him the tie, but liked the attention.
When we went to the Calgary Stampede. There was a section of the rodeo stands reserved for celebrities. I accompanied Bob to all events. We sat together, Bob on my right and next to me on my left was Chief Dan George. Dan George played in many western movies as an Indian. He was a genuine Indian from British Columbia. I was thrilled to be sitting next to him.
The celebrities were introduced to the crowd with much applause. Afterward, people lined up for autographs. As Bob and Chief Dan George were signing, a line formed in front of me. I suppose they thought I was someone important if I was with them. Bob winked at me and nodded his head. So, I started signing autographs. The same thing happened at another gathering where I signed autographs. There are people throughout Canada with my autograph still wondering who the hell Abe March is. Sometimes I don’t know myself.

I mention these incidents in my book as well as an incident where Bob showed me what a true professional is. That’s another story. Bob also signed an autograph for my son that said, “Your Daddy’s best friend, Uncle Bob”. My son was having problems at school, being the American kid, and Bob wanted to help. The autograph did help. Unfortunately that autographed photo was left behind in Beirut along with other memorabilia. I still see Bob Cummings in old movies but have never seen a re-run of his TV series, “Love that Bob” most likely because it was filmed in black and white.

Another celebrity I met while in Canada was Anne Murray and was photographed with her. She was also a warm person who wanted to make you feel good. The little hug will always be remembered.

Have you ever wondered how people feel about you? Did they feel warmth or kindness?
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A Ahad
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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 1:41 am

Some of them have become so rude they wont even reply to e-mails. Pure evil Smile
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alj
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alj

Number of posts : 9633
Registration date : 2008-12-05
Age : 75
Location : San Antonio

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 5:53 am

Dissenting opinion, here.

Maybe it's the neighborhood I live in, but I run into courteous people every time I go out. The store clerks, other people waiting in line, drivers of the cars on the road, there just seems to be an air of friendliness that is growing stronger all the time.

Maybe part of it comes from the tendency I have been working on lately, of smiling most of the time. I'm not sure where that came from. Maybe it came from seeing those smiles on other faces so often. I think that some of it has come about because of a decision I made a while back, to focus on the good news, the kind responses,.

That hasn't been as easy to do here lately. There has been much more negativity here lately that there was for as long as I can remember posting here. I'm not sure why. I realize that I have sometimes responded to it in a negative way, myself. I've given some thought to just walking away for a while, but this group has become an important part of my day. So I have decided to just try to be a part of the positive element. Maybe you guys will help me with that?

I think, much of the time, we find what we are looking for. We can make a decision to look for the little courtesies, and contribute by giving them, regardless of the demeanor of those we are dealing with.

I have been making a point of smiling at the store clerks, and telling them to have a good day. Lately it seems to have become a standard thing from them as well.

I publicly state here that I am going to try to do that on this board. Feel free to remind me when I slip.

Ann
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Abe F. March
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Abe F. March

Number of posts : 10684
Registration date : 2008-01-26
Age : 80
Location : Germany

IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 6:07 am

Ann,
I think you got it right. When you smile, people smile back. I think we attract either positive or negative feelings by our demeanor.
This morning my wife got up feeling good. She even had a smile on her face and that set the tone. We went to the Doctor and the result was good. She said, I'm feeling so good today that I'm afraid something will happen to change that. I replied saying, "Don't think of anything bad, just concentrate on all the good things." We were in the village, Bad Bergsalbern. It is a Kurort - a Spa town. There is a nice pedestrian only shopping zone with sidewalk cafes. It was a sunny morning with a gentle breeze. We had a coffee at one of these open air cafes. The smile on her face caused me to feel great also. After two operations and the Angst of what happens next, it was so great to see her feeling good, smiling and enjoying the day. It made my day. Our waitress seemed especially courteous. Perhaps she got good vibes from us.
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Shelagh
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Shelagh

Number of posts : 12588
Registration date : 2008-01-11
Location : UK

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 7:03 am

Just adding a few smiles.

Very Happy Smile Laughing flower king queen jocolor sunny santa bom IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 973110 lol!

_________________
IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41ZdcL0lV7L._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41C9GeFDNWL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41%2BmGkZJdOL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 51eDGllZXhL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41y7VHKoszL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 51Zs4N4T4eL._SL125_
Amazon Author Central: Shelagh Watkins
I shall never be old. It doesn't suit me -- ©Shelagh Watkins 2017
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alj
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alj

Number of posts : 9633
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Age : 75
Location : San Antonio

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 7:16 am

Abe, good news for you and Gisela. Thanks for sharing it. You both stay in our thoughts.

Ann
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alice
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alice

Number of posts : 15671
Registration date : 2008-10-22
Age : 71
Location : Redmond, WA

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 7:49 am

I admire Ann for her persistence in seeing the good.

The most touching case of manners I have experienced was that of a man in oxygen who jumped up and offered me his seat. I was able-bodied and totally shocked. I declined and he persisted. Finally, I walked away so he could sit.
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alice
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alice

Number of posts : 15671
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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 7:52 am

A Ahad wrote:
Some of them have become so rude they wont even reply to e-mails. Pure evil Smile

Which emails? Rolling Eyes
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A Ahad
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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 11:53 am

No matter, Alice. If I e-mailed you and you could positively identify the e-mail was from me... I'm pretty sure I'll have your reply. A common courtesy between two human beings who know each other. IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 986243
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zadaconnaway
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zadaconnaway

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PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 12:36 pm

I think courtesy and attitudes are contagious. The comments here tend to bear that out. I am often amazed by the courtesy of the young. At least in my little corner of the world. It is often offered up by those one would think of as 'punks'. I always show gratitude for kindness in hopes it will encourage more of the same toward others. Courtesy begins with each person who displays it.
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dkchristi
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dkchristi

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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 1:04 pm

Yes, joy attracts joy; courtesy attracts courtesy. However, I am not by nature a Pollyanna person who smiles all the time. I don't run around with a frown on my face; I have generally a pleasant countenance. I do treat all people with respect; I don't always receive the same in return. I do know that on some of my more difficult days, I have switched my attitude by the smile and/or kindness of other people. It pays to attempt spreading joy, even if slipping on occasion.
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Shelagh
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Shelagh

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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 3:06 pm

A Ahad wrote:
Some of them have become so rude they wont even reply to e-mails. Pure evil Smile
I replied, Abdul. Hope you are feeling better now (that was my message in case it didn't get through!).

_________________
IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41ZdcL0lV7L._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41C9GeFDNWL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41%2BmGkZJdOL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 51eDGllZXhL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 41y7VHKoszL._SL125_ IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? 51Zs4N4T4eL._SL125_
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Abe F. March
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Abe F. March

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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 10:56 pm

dkchristi wrote:
Yes, joy attracts joy; courtesy attracts courtesy. However, I am not by nature a Pollyanna person who smiles all the time. I don't run around with a frown on my face; I have generally a pleasant countenance. I do treat all people with respect; I don't always receive the same in return. I do know that on some of my more difficult days, I have switched my attitude by the smile and/or kindness of other people. It pays to attempt spreading joy, even if slipping on occasion.

I once made the remark that my wife was the most honest person I knew. She disliked people who put on a false smile. A fake smile is obvious. A genuine smile can be felt. My wife would fail as a politicians wife. If she doesn't like somone, they know it. If she likes someone, they know it.
I found it difficult when she attended an office function. If I discussed my irritation about a certain person with her, they would most likely feel her displeasure with them. Perhaps it was her parental instincts in defending her family. Not showing your true feelings is a learned act/art.

Before I gave a presentation, I had to work on myself. I would go into the Men's room, look into the mirror and see what the audience would see. I smiled. Sometimes I would say something funny to myself so that the reaction (smile) was genuine. Once I had a good feeling about myself, I could then present myself to the audience. Perhaps I learned that from Bob Cummings. We were enroute to a live TV broadcast and were late. I was driving the car and didn't know the way. He always wanted to be a bit early so he could use the stations's makeup artist before going on TV. He carried his emergency makeup kit with him. As we neared the station, and being late, he started applying his stage makeup. The movement of the car going over street bumps caused him much irritation and caused him to swear. I pulled up in front of the station and we both ran to the entrance. They saw us coming and as we entered, he was announced to the TV audience. He paused at the stage door, closed his eyes, smiled, and when he opened his eyes he was transformed. He walked in front of the camera appearing relaxed and in control - a mark of a true professional.

I believe we must feel right to appear right. Faking it doesn't work. It must come from within. To control ones feelings, to know how to tap into the right mood, is something one can learn. It is not easy to make a sudden transformation, but for an actor, it is a necessity.

When you meet someone for the first time, they will remember you from that first impression. There is a saying that "You only get one chance to make a first impression." Try to make it a good one.
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A Ahad
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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyTue May 24, 2011 11:49 pm

Shelagh wrote:
A Ahad wrote:
Some of them have become so rude they wont even reply to e-mails. Pure evil Smile
I replied, Abdul. Hope you are feeling better now (that was my message in case it didn't get through!).

I got that on Monday Shelagh. Feeling much better now as well, thanks.
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alj
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alj

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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyWed May 25, 2011 5:20 am

Part of what I have been doing has been to end the day and begin the morning with gratitude. As I go to bed, I go over in my head a list of the good things that have happened during the day. Even on the worst days, I can find something to be thankful for - having had food to eat, a bed to sleep in, a safe place to live - there is always something, and working to bring those little pleasures into my memory make it easier to fall asleep. When I wake up the next morning, I do the same, thinking about the blessings I have to look forward to, and again, there are always some. It is a practice. In the beginning I had to make a point of doing it. Now it is becoming automatic.

I give a few minutes to think about the day's needs, schedule, and any fears I might have about the day's obligations, and consciously let go of the need to control the outcomes, and turn that over to the Universe. I don't force the smiles, I just go through the day, staying in the moment, and once in a while, realize that the smile is there. Whenever I encounter someone, I make a point of saying something pleasant, and the smiles just seem to go with the positive words.

The more I can just live in the moment, the more I feel free to experience a sense of joy at just being, and focusing on the little things I can feel grateful for having in my day just sets the mood.

Just me.

Ann
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alj
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alj

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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyWed May 25, 2011 5:31 am

A bit more - One of the first places I go when I get to my desk each morning is right here, so I can check in with everyone, and see what might have been added. Then I check my mail, and look in on a couple of other sites, including this one.

http://www.dailyom.com/cgi-bin/display/printerfriendly.cgi?articleid=28449

A little synchronicity at the start of the day is always a thing to be grateful for:

Quote :
Life is full of
little wonders that can make us happy. The sound of a baby’s laughter, a
good book, the comforting smell of a favorite old sweatshirt, and the
warmth from a cup of hot tea are simple pleasures that can easily put
smiles on our faces. These “little things” are easily accessible to us
and can be sources for finding happiness. A key to doing so is taking
the time to put those rose colored glasses from childhood back on so you
can easily find the joy in all the “little things” that life has to
offer.

Ann
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Abe F. March
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Abe F. March

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IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? Empty
PostSubject: Re: IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ?   IS COMMON COURTESY A LOST ART TODAY ? YOUR OPINION ? EmptyWed May 25, 2011 6:54 am

Ann, thanks for your post. I think your daily program is a good one. I have used it randomly. Getting into a daily habit is the problem. I suppose I'll have to set myself some reminders. Setting the tone for the day, especially a positive one, affects everything we do or say.

Again, thanks.
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