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 Rembering the one's whom have passed

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Betty Fasig
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Betty Fasig

Number of posts : 4334
Registration date : 2008-06-12
Age : 76
Location : Duette, Florida

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PostSubject: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptySun Sep 01, 2013 3:30 pm

As a preface, my son-in-law's father passed away yesterday.  He was 83.  He was another smoking victim.  His COPD won.  Even though he had not smoked for 20 years, his body could not repair the damage. 

Today, I saw on facebook the picture of him with a sailfish that he had caught...I was reminded of the trips George Anderson, my foster father, took us to Rocky Point, Mexico to go sailfishing.  Well, he did the fishing and his daughter, Barbara and I fried our hides on the hull.  He had built a boat that had a little bathroom, and a couple of small bunks, a large fish well and stuff I did not know what it was for. 
I was reading all the Hemingway books I could get my hands upon. 
I was such a romantic, then. 
The Old Man and The Sea came so alive that I would not have been surprised if I saw a big fish strapped to a small boat.  I did love Hemingway. 

When a person looks at old photographs of the person who has passed, well, it is kind of like a dream.  Seeing them looking happy and alive, kind of eternal living in a picture or a video is all that technology can provide.  Memory has to provide the rest. 

I do not imagine that we are the same person after dying. 
Love,
Betty
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dkchristi
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dkchristi

Number of posts : 8594
Registration date : 2008-12-29
Location : Florida

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptySun Sep 01, 2013 4:19 pm

Thank you, Betty, for sharing your loss and my condolences to all whose lives are touched by his passing.  You are like me in that when a loved one is not on this earth, I remember the joyous moments like a wonderful dream. 

I was looking through some pictures trying to find some of time spent in Germany. Instead (I forgot, we took mostly slides) I found a picture of my former spouse who died this July at the age of 68.  He died too young and it was a difficult loss.  In the picture, he was fishing with our son who was about six at the shore of a mountain lake in New Zealand.  I remember the day was perfect in every way. It was cool enough for winter coats in the bright sunshine with raw, untouched beauty in every direction. We were in our 30's.  It was one of what I call, "vignettes of joy."
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alj
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alj

Number of posts : 9633
Registration date : 2008-12-05
Age : 76
Location : San Antonio

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptySun Sep 01, 2013 7:23 pm

Betty and DK, I am having a memory of my late brother, brought on by the settings of your memories.

Biil and I had been married about a year when we sold the Flying Scot daysailer and got a  26' MORC built by Pearson.  Like the boat Betty remembers, it had a couple of little cabins - the forward one containing two bunks and a "head."

We were very happy to have that head, especially on days we stayed out a long time, even though it was a "manual," which meant it was flushed with a hand pump that worked something like an outdoor water pump in reverse.  It took quite a bit of pumping to get the job done.

This particular day, my brother and his current girlfriend were with us.  My brother took a trip down from the deck.  When he returned a little later, he said, "Man, you've gotta pump the s*** out of that thing."

Hope this memory is not too irreverent - one of those little joyful moments.

Annie
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Abe F. March
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Abe F. March

Number of posts : 10720
Registration date : 2008-01-26
Age : 80
Location : Germany

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptySun Sep 01, 2013 10:37 pm

One thing we know for sure and that is that we will die.  When that happens we don’t know.
We can live a clean and healthy life and be struck down by a car or get in the way of a bullet or many other possibilities.
I think when one reaches the age of 80; they have lived a long life.  In the past, 70 was the goal to reach.  With better health care, people live longer.  I don’t think it matters if they smoke, drink or whatever.  If they are enjoying their life and are satisfied, it shouldn’t matter what others think.  I daily see my 99 year-old neighbor who sits on his favorite chair by the door to his house smoking his cigar.  He enjoys it.  His body is accustomed to the smoke.  To suggest that if he quit smoking he would live longer, is nuts.  Surviving and living is not the same thing.  Enjoying life in my opinion, takes precedence over everything else.  
I will never forget my father who enjoyed eating and the things he liked were taken from him in that it was deemed unhealthy.  He was miserable.  He had a stroke and died of pneumonia in the hospital.
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dkchristi
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dkchristi

Number of posts : 8594
Registration date : 2008-12-29
Location : Florida

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptyMon Sep 02, 2013 9:56 am

It's like so many other things where we want a reason.  Actually, there are many reasons and most of them are unknown to us.
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Domenic Pappalardo
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Domenic Pappalardo

Number of posts : 2557
Registration date : 2009-04-27

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptyWed Sep 25, 2013 8:18 am

We all die. I’m sure everybody has though about, “What happens after?”

I have never known anybody to reason out the after is going to be bad. Some Believe in a next life, others think going to heaven is their path. I have even heard others think they become a part of the Universe?

If you listed all the theories people have…only one of them can be true. If asked, each would tell you theirs is that one true one…if asked, I would even tell you mine is the true one. Two things are for certain, we will die, and what we can do, can only be done during our living…so be kind to each other. All else is a waste of the very short time we have…spend it well.
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dkchristi
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dkchristi

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Location : Florida

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptyWed Sep 25, 2013 8:48 am

Deep into my intellect I believe that when we die, it is nothing. It is like deep sleeping without dreaming.  Since we go to sleep every night without fear, then death is nothing to fear.

In my heart of hearts I wish for a spiritual afterlife.  Yet, my intellect says that even if such a thing occurs, it will still be deep sleep because that spiritual something will not be the dead me.

The closest I see to an afterlife is through the genes we pass on and the memories we leave - and those too will be unknown to us.

I agree that living each day well is the best we can do - we might as well be kind and not worry about riches or fame because time will fly by and the deep sleep equalizes it all.
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Abe F. March
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Abe F. March

Number of posts : 10720
Registration date : 2008-01-26
Age : 80
Location : Germany

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptyWed Sep 25, 2013 11:07 am

A friend and neighbor passed away on Tuesday.  Erich Nuss was 56 years old, was a vegetarian, didn't smoke or drink.  He was getting ready for the harvest.  Vineyards and orchards hanging full.  On monday night he said he didn't feel well.  On tuesday morning he was sweating in bed and his wife got him up and they were on their way to the hospital.  He said, "I'm feeling better, turn around and take me home."  His wife refused and continued on her way.  Suddenly Erich fell forward in his seat.  By the time they got to the hospital it was too late.  A heart attack.
We are constantly reminded to call 112 (here) and 911 (in the US) when there is an emergency.  Don't try to do it on your own.  We assume that if the emergency crew had picked him up, they may have saved him.  
I think when our time comes, it won't matter where we are or what we are doing, whether we are rich or poor, death is certain.
Eat, drink and be merry.  We don't know what tomorrow brings. 
I agree with the previous posts.  Remembering loved ones is helped by photos.  Remembering friends is helped by reminders.  Today as I took a walk, I went by one of Erich's vineyards and remembered helping him cut grape vines after the harvest.  I suppose there will always be reminders of those who pass.

Erich has one son who is an engineer and didn't want to work the vineyards.  He has a daughter married to a Canadian living in Western Canada.
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dkchristi
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dkchristi

Number of posts : 8594
Registration date : 2008-12-29
Location : Florida

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptyWed Sep 25, 2013 11:49 am

I am sorry for the loss - and suddenly at such a young age.  No matter how philosophical one wishes to be, we are still touched by death, each in our own way with our own grieving process.
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Rick Waid



Number of posts : 6
Registration date : 2014-12-21

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PostSubject: Re: Rembering the one's whom have passed   Rembering the one's whom have passed EmptySun Dec 21, 2014 6:40 am

We all have lost loved ones. Remember their memories and energy is still around us. I just watched Jack Frost last night and they do stop by every once and awhile. I know many have felt their mom or dad around them. Do not let that go because it is real my friends. I offer this information because I have lived it for the last 7 years helping people. Happy holidays.
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