What Are You Glad About?

I don't have faith in doctors. Unfortunately, the older generations still do. Especially as people age, doctors tend to give up on them. The best thing ever happened to my mom was her doctor retiring. Her new doctor was a specialist in geriatric medicine and treats his elderly patients as though they had long lives ahead of them - and thanks to him, they have better quality in those long lives.

If anyone is seeing a doctor and their mental adjustment to life is still not the best for a quality life, they need to reconsider their medical care and find another practitioner.

We seem to look at the brain as though it is a cause effect place where we can will it well or sick. The brain is organic like any other part of the body. When we break a leg, we take action to get it well. When the brain is broken, we need to take action to help it get well. Even some medicines for other ailments can have an affect on the brain.

A simple example is steroids. I have occupational asthma caused by my place of employment. I still suffer with bouts. When I do, the physician prescribes a treatment using steroids. I am prescribed a very few tablets. I know why. Boy, do I have a positive attitude when I am taking that medicine! We all know the detrimental effects from continuous use of steroids.

Similarly, some medications have the opposite affect on the brain chemistry. That's why a physician with an understanding of elderly issues is critical.

My dad suffered depression. Near the end of his life, he had many health issues from diabetes and hardly left his home. One day a relative came by and asked why he wasn't playing the piano. My dad loved playing piano! He had performed professionally. He had to quit when the arthritis interfered with the keys. Yet, his music still sounded grand. The relative suggested he play at nursing homes and hospitals "They will be grateful and won't notice if you miss a note." The last years of my dad's life were full of joy. Once he was on that circuit, he was busy all the time bringing joy to others.

For each person, there are different answers.

For most of my life, I dealt with bouts of chronic depression that began in my childhood. It was not until I reached 50 that I finally decided that I ought not to have to struggle with those periods alone, and got help. It was not until I had been in therapy for a while that I realized that I had a chronic disease. I had been taught, and believed, that I should have been able to "just snap out of it."

It's a complicated condition, and even the experts are not really sure how much is nurture and how much nature. Certainly there is a physiological element that has to do with the presence of certain chemicals in the brain. I chose not to use any drugs, and spent about a year and a half making regular visits to the therapist, discussing the reasons for my beliefs, my triggers, and learning coping skills, which included being able to change those mistaken beliefs, and realizing that it was not my job to carry the heavy amount of responsibility I had carried for other people most of my life. When I decided to stop, that led to other troublesome situations. The people I knew were not particularly happy about my progress, especially when it meant that I was handing all that baggage I had been carrying back to those it belonged to. My therapist explained that, by changing, I created a vacuum that pulled them into places they did not want to be. I had to learn to accept that, and let go of feeling any responsibility for the outcomes.

I have read that, often, our little microcosmic "worlds" reflect the gigantic macrocosm of the whole world, and I seem to see that happening here - happening to the point that I am seriously considering the need for me to accept and let go of this particular little world right here.

This thread is a good example of why. It began and an attempt to pull us out of our current negative trend by discussing why we were glad, and quickly turned into a discussion about depression.

During the last few days I have looked back over many of the threads here, and have noticed that most of them get sucked into the same place, with basically the same conversations going on, over and over again. The world, we are saying, is a pretty sorry place. And since that is what we see, we start to feel powerless, and come here, playing our own personal little control games, hoping that if we feel a bit of power over somebody else, we might feel a little better about ourselves for a little while.

I have to be selfish here, because this atmosphere is one of those triggers for me. If the atmosphere doesn't change, I cannot allow myself to stay.

One of the beliefs that I have changed has to do with the very power of the concept of belief. Much of what we see in the world is a product of our beliefs. We see what we expect to see.

I have also come to realize that I am not alone. I am part of a larger, very interrelated society; however, there are many members of the society who have not yet come to see the depth of our interconnection, so I cannot say that I completely create my own reality, because there are all these other co-inhabitants out there with their own perspectives and beliefs, all busy creating their own worlds, and their worlds overlap with mine. So, we all co-create our reality.

This world is in the process of massive change. We cannot deny that, even when we want to. There isn't a way to turn back. This new paradigm is here, and we can either accept it, and our interconnectedness, and flow with it, or we can continue to fight against it and try to control it.

One of the little coping skills that I learned involved the practice of conscious gratitude. I keep a journal, and one of the things I do everyday, usually the first thig, is to write down several things that I can feel grateful for in the moment I write. Sometimes that is harder than other times. Sometimes I have to start with I am breathing, therefore probably alive. Making a commitment and practicing has been a big help.

We can overcome depression, but we cannot do it alone. It requires having someone who can validate the reality of our sadness and our reasons for feeling sad. Once that has been done, it requires learning new skills, self-introspection (which is OK once we know that we are not to blame), and actively working toward forming new, more valid beliefs. And it involves knowing your triggers, establishing boundaries, and avoiding the places where the negative vibes and attempts to cross your boundaries are too strong.

I am glad to have been a part of a group that supported each other and stayed together in spite of a lot of negative forces that were intent on bringing the group down for as long as this group has done.

I an glad that the macrocosm is changing and I believe that the changes are necessary parts of a co-creation of a better worldview and way of life that includes all groups and works together for the good of the whole.

I am glad that I have made friends who have stayed together for several years and various places. I am glad that they have accepted me, at least in the past, as I am with all my shortcomings and flaws. I am glad that they know how to get in touch with me should I decide that it is better for me and for this place if I stay away for a while.

Just me.

Ann

Ann, your candid discussion of depression is appreciated. I have often had an "oh shucks" in the pit of my stomach when I have revealed something personal. There is not privacy among friends on anything on the Internet. Yet, sometimes a personal revelation is very helpful to others who can relate.

First, artists are by nature a group of people whose emotions are often their creative force. It may be any of the prescribed labels for emotional differences - but depression is high on the list. Very often creative arts result from seeking a resolution for an emotional issue. Artists are often introspective and prefer isolation to the challenges of relationships.

The fact that threads change in focus does not bother me so much as it seems to bother others. My purpose in reading an writing on this forum is the company of people whose ideas help me think better and often feel less isolated as the program runs in the background of my writing projects. I can slip away when I am blocked and think on another path. Miracle: I am often able to return to my work with a fresh approach.

It's much more interesting when there are people of other viewpoints. What distresses me is when it becomes a thread of personal attacks. Sometimes, people feel attacked when that is not the intention. Sometimes, attacks are the subliminal intention, not the plan. Remembering that artists are persons of high emotional content, sensitivity and anger triggers seem logical.

Some topics repeat. New people come to the forum so a repeated topic might be of interest to them. When a topic repeats, it may still need further discussion.

We are here because we write. The written word may be many topics. A discussion of depression is relative to many books written, either in the lives of the characters or in the personal biographies of people.

If we moved the topic to a thread titled "depression," it would probably fizzle. Sometimes things bubble up because they are necessary. One of the things I have enjoyed about this forum is its informality in several aspects. However, we can work together to tidy up threads and bring them gently back to their beginning subject.

I am glad for the discussion regarding depression. Regardless of how it got here and how it hijacked the thread, I hope an open discussion about such a meaningful topic benefits someone suffering who has not reached the point to discuss their suffering openly. I have a friend who was raised to keep her problems to herself and always have a sunny exterior. She has zero understanding for someone who sees life darkly.

I am glad today that it's 75 degrees, sunny and breezy. My windows are open to the wind and the outside world. It is beautiful.

I am glad today that there are people on this forum who think and care and express ideas and thoughts even if no one else cares. I am glad the forum is here to read and write and a place to go - without leaving my work at hand.

DK, if it were just this thread and this topic I would not be having this problem. My problem is with the negative focus that has been taking over every topic started during the past few weeks.

This used to be a fun place to share and learn and support each other.

It would be a good thing, IMO, if we could find our way back to that.

Ann

Today I'm glad because I received a cheque from Amazon (in dollars) for downloads of my books since June (the books have been available for twelve months but sold next to nothing during the first eight months). I have worked really hard to achieve this; royalties less than $100 are not paid out overseas. The sales have encouraged me to work even harder and, right now, I should be writing. As soon as I've written this post, I will return to my imaginary world and take Emmelisa and Dell Planemaker on the final stages of their new adventure.

My dad always said that hard work never killed anyone. He should know. He's eighty-six and has worked hard all his life. He's working to stay alive, now. He sits on his exercise bike and cycles while watching television with the sound turned down, listening to the radio and singing at the top of his voice. It's a sight to be seen. His lungs are wrecked from smoking since the age of thirteen (he gave up about twenty years ago). He still bowls (which is why he exercises, so that he can) and keeps himself as busy as his body will allow. A fine example of getting out of life as much as you are prepared to put into it. Some people just can't be bothered. It's too much like hard work. Speaking of which, two adventurous children are wondering where I am! Coming Dell and Lisa!

Quote :

Today I'm glad because I received a cheque from Amazon (in dollars) for downloads of my books since June

Glad to hear it! Royalty checks are always good, no matter how they're spelled.

Joe, dmondeo and LC - thanks for the support and kind words! Joe...love the flower, made me smile!

DKChristi...depression runs deep. Thanks for defending the argument well.

I appreciate you all! With gratitude, Lee

Glad....to be here! Thanks again.

11/2/2011



Lee..

Thank you. I'm honored..


Cheers..Joe

One never knows when writing what the reader may glean from it or how timely it is.
The subject of depression is timely and the comments made are relevant.
Thanks for the posts and comments.

I might add that depression is not something one needs to hide. It is not even a problem unless we choose to make it one. When depression is seen as something unacceptable it becomes a problem. The most negative aspects stem from a lack of understanding on the part of ourselves as well as that of the other people in our lives.

Sometimes it is simply a journey inward, a "dark night of the soul," which we take when we have a need to explore our depths. Going underground, diving into deep waters, exploring the shadows, entering the forest or the cave, are all forms of going within ourselves, and once we accept that it is a positive thing, we can find our hidden sources of light and renewal.

We learn to harness the power that comes from that glowing red stone we find in the hidden room of the underground cave.

There is light in the darkness. That is a truth one cannot learn unless s/he has been there.

Ann

Just finished chapter fourteen (61,000 words) ... only four chapters to go! Even I'm getting excited at this stage in the adventure!

Congratulations! I just finished a rewrite and can only get to 50,000....need to pad somewhere but my heart isn't in it.

I am glad that my son, Dave, and his family are finally back at home. They have been staying on the university campus where he and Lyn teach since the snowstorm knocked out the power at their house. They learned through Facebook that their power came back on late last night. He said they lost a couple of trees, but neither of them damaged the house.

Dave said that Jaycie got very excited as they drove up, and said, "Jaycie's house is home." Pretty cool for a 30-month-old little girl.




Oh, and I am now

Nannie Annie

From the mouths of babes. Beautiful picture!

I'm supposed to be a grandmother at this point. It doesn't look promising. I've already helped my friend raise her grandchildren - two sets - from babies to college with one set and starting over with the second set.

Is there such a thing as a grandmother look?

I think one of the cool things about being a grandmother is that you don't have to have a "look." That's Mommy's and Daddy's territory.

Ann

I have a nice, complicated story to tell. When I was working, I hired a workman to fix some things in my house He was very efficient and economical, a competent worker who charged fairly. It was a miracle to find such a person. I wrote him a check for $200 to pick up some things needed for further work he was going to do. I didn't hear from him for a long time and I had so much going on I just let it go figuring the work he had done was quite exceptional so the $200 wasn't a real loss. But it bugged me a bit.

Finally, I called him. Not only did he have a lot of apologies but he also heard I had a room to rent and suggested renting the room and doing work I needed to help defray the cost. I considered his idea; but then things changed and the room was no longer available. He disappeared again and I figured he was gone because he had no work and no place to live.

It's now past two years since I heard from him. This morning he came and fixed several things that were more than the $200 I had written off. He is an honest person who just had a lot of distractions and couldn't pay back the $200 but couldn't get here to do the work either. But he was not a thief. He always knew he would either have the $200 to pay back or the time to fix stuff.

Now, I don't have the money to fix the things he took care of this morning. If he didn't owe me a debt, they would have gone undone until they cost me plenty. Sometimes life's gifts come in complicated packages. I am glad for an honest workman, regardless of how long it took for him to follow through.

Part of life's rich tapestry, DK.

Hey Everybody!

Just want to thank you for your well wishes! Mom got a pace maker put in on Thursday and she is home resting. I appreciate you all...Lee

That's what I'm glad about!

Thank you, Lee, for the update.

That's good news Lee.

I'm glad to be with my daughter and grand children.

I am glad about Lee's mom. I am glad about Diane's repairs and the faith she has in human kind, I am glad that I have the friends on this forum who have helped me in so many ways.

I am glad that the raccoons have joined the cranes, the squirrels and the birds in not being afraid of us and are making a living here.

Love,
Betty

I am glad for Lee's mom doing well. I am glad for Betty's short stories up on Smashwords. I am glad for my successful Ghost Orchid seminar at the Keystone Garden Center this morning where I sold quite a few books and had a delightful audience to talk about sex, myths and magic - the life of the ghost orchid. I am glad for friends; sometimes I forget that I am blessed to know some very special people. I am grateful for my mom's health. I am grateful for things that remain unsaid. I'm just plain full of gratitude, period!