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 Query for Chasing the Sandpiper

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pol mcshane
zadaconnaway
George Maciver
Karina Kantas
Jenny
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Jenny
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Jenny


Number of posts : 531
Registration date : 2008-01-11
Location : Sheffield, England

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PostSubject: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyWed Feb 27, 2008 4:28 pm

Following on from a suggestion by Brenda, I asked Shelagh to add this thread to the forum. Here is my query for my current manuscript. Comments, suggestions are welcome:

Mystery and danger – and love – await Anna MacDonald when she moves into her late grandmother’s remote Highland cottage.

This is the premise of CHASING THE SANDPIPER, a 70,000 word romantic suspense novel that takes the reader on a journey from the shores of a remote Scottish Loch to the beach at Cape Cod. In addition to romance, it also involves a case of mistaken identity, abduction, and a treacherous mountain rescue.

When professor Anna MacDonald’s boyfriend (and boss) gives the promotion that was rightfully hers to his new fling, she quits her job out of injured pride. Now she’s unable to afford the rent on her fashionable Edinburgh flat, so she retreats to the only place she ever felt at home – Grandma’s old croft house at Loch Hourn, in the Scottish Highlands. With only two border collies for company, Anna sets out to prove to herself she can make it as a novelist.

At the same time, renowned Boston artist Luke Tallantyre makes a miscalculation while sailing his yacht across the Atlantic, and lands in Loch Hourn with engine trouble. Looking for help, he knocks on the door of the first house he sees – Anna’s croft. She immediately resents the cranky American’s intrusion. Luke thinks she’s an ill-mannered hermit. And so the chemistry begins.

But Anna is also being terrorized by night. Someone is prowling around her property at night, and terrifying noises echo through her house. When her Land Rover is vandalized, she realizes someone wants her out of her home, and they mean business.

Her best friend (and local psychic) Morag has a solution: let the big strong American stay in the croft’s spare room to ward off intruders. For a while, this works, until Anna’s tormentor finally reveals himself and his bloody intentions....

My first novel, THREE WEEKS LAST SPRING, a suspense tale set in Washington State’s San Juan Islands, has received four star reviews from Midwest Book Reviews, Allbookreviews.com, and Coffee Time Romance.

Until recently, I lived in Scotland not far from the setting of CHASING THE SANDPIPER. I am an avid reader of romantic suspense novels, and wrote this story with those markets in mind.

I would be pleased to send you a partial or full manuscript. Thank you for considering my work.
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http://www.victoriahoward.co.uk
Karina Kantas
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Age : 50
Location : Corfu Greece

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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 1:09 am

Thats a good query. Have you had any bites?

I change my letters slightly, depending on what the agent is looking for. It's always good to do research on an agent before submitting. Most agents have blogs and you can learn a lot about the kind of query letters they want.

I'm currently submitting my urban thriller to literary agents. 7 rejections so far, but there are three more subs still out there.

I'll post my query letter up, up in a couple of days.
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George Maciver
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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 1:19 am

I'm not an expert in this field and really have no idea what constitutes a good query letter so I'll listen with interest.
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Jenny
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Jenny


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Location : Sheffield, England

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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 1:37 am

Karina,

I have two agents and three e-bookpublishers who have expressed interest and requested partials - but no firm offers yet.
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http://www.victoriahoward.co.uk
zadaconnaway
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zadaconnaway


Number of posts : 4017
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Age : 76
Location : Washington, USA

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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 1:55 am

Like George, I will be watching to see what others are saying about this Jenny. It sounds good to me.

I am learning much from those of you willing to post your thoughts, works, queries, etc. Thank you, I do appreciate it.
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pol mcshane
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pol mcshane


Number of posts : 112
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Location : Texas

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PostSubject: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 5:07 am

Sounds like a great letter, Jenny. I hope you have great luck with it. I have the hardest time with these Mad .
Please let us know how this works for you.
All the best!
Pol
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Jenny
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Jenny


Number of posts : 531
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Location : Sheffield, England

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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 5:20 am

Hi Pol,

If you look under the "agents" thread you will see the current state of play.
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Malcolm
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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Feb 29, 2008 6:41 pm

Agent Noak Lukeman (I mentioned him in another thread) seems to think it's important to begin a query letter with a short graph saying why you're contacting this particular agent. Having a reason, he suggests, proves to one extent or another that the writer didn't just throw a dart at a list of agents, but instead. actually spent some time selecting the agent based on books and genres the agent has represented before.

The best thing, of course, is to be able to say that one is contacting agent XYZ because somebody whom the agent works with suggested it. Otherwise, mentioning that one is doing i because of the genres they specialise in or because of a certain similar book the represented seems to be next on Lukeman's list.

Has anyone else seen and/or tried out similar query letter advice?

Malcolm
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Jenny
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Jenny


Number of posts : 531
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Location : Sheffield, England

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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptySat Mar 01, 2008 7:05 am

Malcolm,

I usually add an opening paragraph saying why I am contacting the agent and that I see from their website that they are open to submissions from new authors.
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Domenic Pappalardo
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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyThu Mar 24, 2011 12:48 pm

I'm not good at writing a query. Your query sounds good. It sees to get better as you read down the page.
The first line looks weak:

Mystery and danger – and love – await Anna MacDonald when she moves into her late grandmother’s remote Highland cottage.

Mystery, danger, and love...?

Like I said, I am not good at query letters. The more I read of yours, the more I wanted to read.

A little side note: Have something else go wrong with the sailboat. A singlehanded sailboat would be 30-40 feet, and will carry 15-30 gallons of fuel. They don't motor across an ocean. An engine on a sailboat is used to get in, and out of a marina, or danger.
You might want to visit a marina, and talk to some sailboat guys.(and gals.)
If you can't find anyone to help you...I can give you a billion and one things that do go wrong at sea.


Last edited by Domenic Pappalardo on Fri Apr 22, 2011 3:52 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Abe F. March
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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyThu Mar 24, 2011 11:16 pm

My thoughts mirror those of Domenic. Wanted to read more.
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dkchristi
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PostSubject: Re: Query for Chasing the Sandpiper   Query for Chasing the Sandpiper EmptyFri Mar 25, 2011 5:29 am

My friends sailed the 30 foot Once in a Blue Moon from the East Coast of the U.S. to Venezuela and back without an engine. The Coast Guard wouldn't let them sail back into the harbor (after staying offshore to survive a horrid storm) without an engine. They took the dingy engine and tied it off the stern of the boat to appear like they had an engine and sailed in. Their next trip was an Atlantic crossing. Many have sailed solo around the world in single hand craft from 30 foot to 42 foot and written books about their experience.

Blue water sailors are a fearless lot; and many ruggedly independent and single minded. Their fearlessness can be a danger to others when they get in trouble and need a rescue. A simple through hull leak can sink a ship. Lightning can split it in two. Hidden obstructions in the sea (the sea is a humungous garbage dump and things fall from container ships and barges).
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