Don Stephens Five Star Member
Number of posts : 1355 Registration date : 2008-01-25 Age : 85 Location : Wherever my hat's hanging today!
| Subject: Are You ready For Some Football Wed Sep 24, 2014 10:32 am | |
| - Quote :
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- Quote :
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- Quote :
- Ohio State's Urban Meyer on one of his players: "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades and he doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words."
___________________________________________ Why do Tennessee fans wear orange? So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up trash on Monday. ___________________________________________ What does the average Alabama player get on his SATs? Drool. ___________________________________________ How many Notre Dame freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb? None. That's a sophomore course. ___________________________________________ How did the Georgia football player die from drinking milk? The cow fell on him. ___________________________________________ Two West Virginia football players were walking in the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird." The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" ___________________________________________ A University of Mississippi football player was almost killed yesterday in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse. ___________________________________________ What do you say to a University of Miami Hurricane football player dressed in a three-piece suit? " "Will the defendant please rise." ___________________________________________ If three Maryland Terrapin football players are in the same car, who is driving? The police officer. ___________________________________________ How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a girlfriend? There's tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck. ___________________________________________ What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas cheerleaders in one room? A full set of teeth. ___________________________________________ University of Michigan Coach Brady Hoke is only going to dress half of his players for the game this week; the other half will have to dress themselves. ___________________________________________ How is the South Carolina football team like an opossum? They play dead at home and get killed on the road. ___________________________________________ Why did the Nebraska linebacker steal a police car? He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche. ___________________________________________ How do you get a former Illinois football player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza. ___________________________________________ What are the longest three years of a University of Florida football player’s life? Freshman I, Freshman II, and Freshman III. |
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Abe F. March Five Star Member
Number of posts : 10768 Registration date : 2008-01-26 Age : 85 Location : Germany
| Subject: Re: Are You ready For Some Football Wed Sep 24, 2014 10:48 am | |
| Good ones, Don. I needed a chuckle. |
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Shelagh Admin
Number of posts : 12662 Registration date : 2008-01-11 Location : UK
| Subject: Re: Are You ready For Some Football Wed Sep 24, 2014 10:51 am | |
| I read out a couple to my husband; he's still laughing! |
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slb Four Star Member
Number of posts : 926 Registration date : 2010-11-04 Age : 57 Location : Oskaloosa, Iowa
| Subject: Re: Are You ready For Some Football Wed Oct 01, 2014 6:19 pm | |
| Why does University of Minnesota use artificial turf?
So the cheerleaders won't graze.
Some oldies but goodies there. |
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| Subject: Re: Are You ready For Some Football | |
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