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 These people exist

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slb
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Number of posts : 857
Registration date : 2010-11-04
Age : 50
Location : Oskaloosa, Iowa

PostSubject: These people exist   Tue May 26, 2015 7:48 pm

Okay, I don't know if these stories are true, but I wouldn't be surprised.
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.
I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the
teenager at the counter.
'You don't?' I replied.
'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.
'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'
'That's right.'
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets
(Unbelievable but sadly true...)
(Must have been the same one I asked for sweetener,
and she said they didn't have any, only Splenda and sugar.)

TWO
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. 
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?'
I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'
She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue to what had just happened.
( But the lady behind me had a big smirk on her face as I left)
THREE
A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly.
When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.'
(Keep shuddering!!)
FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?'
'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.
'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered,
handing it and the car keys to me. As I
took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and
check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'
PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself !!!
FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies.
Brunette, by the way!!
SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......'
Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency right away'
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Abe F. March
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PostSubject: Re: These people exist   Tue May 26, 2015 10:13 pm

Thanks Stephen, you just gave me my morning smile.
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dkchristi
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Location : Florida

PostSubject: Re: These people exist   Wed May 27, 2015 10:43 am

I interviewed a lady for a typing job.  She picked up the mouse and pointed it at the computer to turn it on. 

I often take my car keys with me as all my keys are on the same ring.  I often attempt to open my friend's car with the "thingy" and it does not work.

I drove my friend's car into my drive and to get into my garage, I pointed her "thingy" at the garage door.  Big surprise; it did not open.

I keep all my house doors locked.  I often go out the front door, walk around to the backyard for some activity and then try to get in the locked back door.

Of course, the worst was when the brand new, silent, slow moving hurricane garage door was installed.  I was in a hurry, hopped into my car and backed into the closed garage door even though I had clicked the "thingy."  The garage door was to quiet and too slow.

I was beat out of that one by my mom.  She opened the garage door and backed out of the garage and smashed into the front of my sister-in-law's Firebird.

As a grand conclusion, I will not list the number of times I have driven over the cement parking bumpers.

Of course, I used "I" to tell the story - the real "I" would never do such things.
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Abe F. March
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PostSubject: Re: These people exist   Wed May 27, 2015 10:47 am

DK.  How many of the "I's" are true?
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dkchristi
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PostSubject: Re: These people exist   Wed May 27, 2015 1:15 pm

Ah, mysteries never cease :-) Very Happy
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