Giving thanks ...

An old man calls his son and says, "Listen, your mother and I are getting divorced. Forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

“We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,” he says. "I'm sick of her face, and I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister and tell her," and he hangs up.

Now, the son is worried. He calls his sister. She says, "Like hell they’re getting divorced!" She calls their father immediately. "You’re not getting divorced! Don't do another thing. The two of us are flying home tomorrow to talk about this. Until then, don't call a lawyer, don't file a paper. DO YOU HEAR ME?” She hangs up the phone.

The old man turns to his wife and says, "Okay, they’re both coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own airfares."

I love it!

An elderly couple in their nineties sees a lawyer about getting a divorce.
"How long have you been married?" the lawyer asks.
"75 years," they say.
"How come you're getting a divorce after all these years together?"
"We wanted to wait until the children were dead."